Pinatas promote violence against flambuoyant animals.
-Demetri Martin.

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Jesus loves you.
Everybody else thinks you're an ass.
-Saved.

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I can no more believe in God than I can believe an invisible monkey lives in my ass; however, I would believe in both if they could be scientifically proven.
- The Gargoyle, by Andrew Davidson.

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Pooping is fun.
- Some tattoo artist.

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Potatoes kill people.
- Geof Manthorne, from Ace of Cakes.

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It's the best. It's the ground. - 801 Underground, The Used.

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The opposite of war isn't peace; it's creation. - La Vie Boheme, RENT.

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Dude, God so hates you right now. – unknown.

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Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. - Christopher Robin to Pooh Bear, A.A. Milne.

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It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realise just how much you love them. - Agatha Christie.

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I hate meeting babies. - Demetri Martin.

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We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit. - E.E. Cummings.

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Science is one cold-hearted bitch with a 14-inch strap-on. - Vince Masuka, Dexter.

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If a tree falls down in the forest... It's still a tree, ain't it? - Jason Stackhouse, True Blood.

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It's a diet coke with lime! - Andy, True Blood.

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Dean: We're humans. And when humans want something really really bad, we lie.
Castiel: Why?
Dean: Because... that's how you become President. - Dean Winchester and Castiel, Supernatural.

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